…but don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me. As long as you keep quiet you’re as good as gold. Mom just wants a break from the mayhem for as long as she can get it. She’s in the kitchen now doing the ironing and listening to music on the radio. And smoking. Always smoking. There are lipstick marks on all the cigarette butts in the ashtray. Bright red lipstick. You think this is normal, don’t you? But the lipstick is unusual. Women wear lipstick to make an impression, but who is she trying to impress? The only ones who will see her today are you and your little brother. Mom is mysterious in a lot of ways. And trust me, you’ll spend the rest of your life trying to figure her out.

But you’re not really thinking about her now, are you? You’re thinking about the future. A bit earlier you reached your little hand into the shaft of sunlight streaming in beneath the partially drawn window shade. You grasped at the little points of light you saw swirling there. You couldn’t catch them or even feel them. You imagined them to be little stars, right? And that started you thinking about outer space, and that led you to think about the future—rocket ships, flying cars, cities on the moon—that kind of stuff. You’re haunted by the future, aren’t you? It’s probably that “Tom Corbet, Space Cadet” show on TV that you like so much. You think that’s pretty much what the future’s gonna look like, don’t you? But years later you’ll laugh at how silly it really was. Believe me, the future will never look like that. It will come in due time and a lot of that stuff you dream about will come with it. But be patient. And try, if you can, to focus on RIGHT NOW.

One day you’ll come to realize that RIGHT NOW was a pretty great place to be, and your heart will ache for want of everything you had when it WAS “right now.” Like that music that’s playing on the radio: that’s the theme from “Moulin Rouge.” Mom used to hum it to you when you were a baby. That’s why it makes you feel…what? Safe, I guess. And it always will. There’s also that puzzle map of the United States you were playing with earlier. You just barely understand the concept of “country” and have no real grasp of scale. But you’ve been taught that the puzzle is a representation of the country where you live, and that little pink, mitten-shaped piece is Wisconsin. And Wisconsin is home. As you get older you will venture further and further away from home, but you’ll always manage to return. You will also learn–as the years go by and the journeys continue–that the world is both way bigger and way smaller than you ever imagined. I guess that sounds pretty weird to you now, but someday you’ll know what I’m talking about.

Your favorite piece of the puzzle—other than Wisconsin, of course—is Montana, isn’t it? You like the deep purple color, and the little stylized mountains. You will be drawn to mountains your whole life without really knowing why. There aren’t any mountains in Wisconsin and it will be years before you even see one. But few things in the world inspire you like the sight (or even idea) of snow-capped mountains. It had to begin with that purple Montana puzzle piece. Cherish that puzzle. The memory of it will stay with you forever. And one day you will miss it dearly. I know, because…well…I once had a puzzle like that.

Your brother is beginning to stir, and nap time is almost over, so I’ll let you go now. But I will be back again, and soon. I’ve been thinking of you a good deal lately.

Note to those of us who reside in the future. Here’s a link to the Song from Moulin Rouge: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0i1ljAoQ2B4